谜

越想懂你 就越不了解你
走的越近 感觉越远
眼前的人 是不是真实的你
我该前进 还是该放弃
明明熟悉 却似陌生
害怕相信以后
换来悲伤
看不见 猜不透
就像被诅咒
下一分钟 你可能随风飘流
而我还在原地保留
找不到答案 只好默默回首

nice song

i am listening to this song and like it very much, i love her voice!

i must be going crazy sitting in front the lappie for few hours and don't know what to do.yea, blogging..writing my feelings is the only thing i do.words express everything.and when i first came to blogging is when i feel no one out there..only i started with my words.u might not b reading this, no one might c this, bt at least i have a place to throw out my feelings.i do feel good after all these. :>

untitled.

waking up early in the morning again! have a real bad sore throat + headache nw..and tonight i'm gonna go buffet dinner..how can i enjoy foood with this kind of condition? didn't have a good sleep last night, almost waking up every hour..what's going wrong?

hmmm, are you a perfectionist? do you demand highly on everything and not easily contented? *silence*, i guess i am, i used to be, and i wish i will not continue to behave this way. sometimes i feel like not doing anything is so much better than doing things and yet failing. why? no room for mistakes?i'm easily vulnerable to the opinions of others.sensitive to what others think of me.will strive to be perfect to avoid "harsh" criticisms. this is not a good thing. y can't i just take things easily?

good enough is just not good enough. mum always say that i set unnecessary high goals for myself and thus making myself so stress.yea, failure to me is just what it is, the inability to make something better of myself. but i understand through mistakes, one will learn and grow and gain more.y am i taking mistakes as such a big horror!!! with this kind of attitude, i guess i will be failing more! i am my own heaven and hell.. WAKE UP,LULU LOH!!

无聊篇之二

原来小提琴可以是很优美的。我是指那旋律。以前并不很喜欢，反而现在听着听着也能有令一番滋味。所有的人和事情也一样。总有美和丑的一面。看你把哪样放得比较大，看得比较重。

很久没有试过那感觉了。一望无际的天，平静的湖面。很宁静。这反而衬托出心中那千百种的杂念。很想躺在辽阔的大草地，仰望星空，吹着风，把开心的，不开心的事全都吹走。生活可以很简单，可是我总是夹在复杂之间。没有前进，没有退后。只是停顿了。

今晚心情有点乱，有点慌。加上喉咙又痛。这感觉不好受！还是睡觉好了。晚安。

无聊的晚上

有个冲动想唱K，好久没有唱歌了。若在房里大展歌喉，我想该会被邻居投诉吧，要不然就向我扔蛋！真讨厌这种被抑制的情绪，想放纵自己轻松一下也不能！要等到下个礼拜回家才能和妹妹们唱个痛快。


不知怎的，最近腰酸背痛，加上有点热气，喉咙干涩涩的。人大概就是犯贱吧，凌晨12点多了也不甘上床休息，生病也活该！


最近GSS大减价，逛街也逛疯了。每经过一间超市，商场，样样大折扣，多看几眼，手又痒了，就是想买。还好没逛大名牌店。。说到名牌，有真的这个必要吗？真的人有我也要有吗？手袋买了几十个，有那么多时间用吗？钱又不够人多，玩什么名牌包包小玩意儿，偶尔买一两个过瘾就好了，不用一直更新换款吧！除非我老爸开银行。嗯，倒也不是，开银行我也不会花太多在名牌包包。。哈哈。你又是如何看待名牌呢？提着大名牌的人就是很富有了吗？对他刮目相看吗？简直是狗眼看人低！可是这个社会就是这样！太现实了吧！唉，人靠衣装真的一点也没错。说到名牌包，看中了好几个好久好久，可是我还是不舍得花几千块在它身上！反而你买了，还怕会弄脏，被雨淋，被人偷，更糟糕的是跟别人撞款！ 花钱旅行享受好过！今年一样，没有买任何手袋！忍耐力厉害吧。。还能抵挡诱惑！


刚才上网找到了“有阳光的地方就有华人”这一系列书的预购网子，那价格真吓我一跳！3本书新币388实在太贵了吧，虽然想看，可是我该不会买吧。希望能在图书馆找得到吧！


有时候，很多事情，你想要的，却得不到，想拥有的却偏偏离你很远。执着，不如放开! 懂得放手时也是你拥有最多的时候。。


晚安。

突然觉得我只是一个人
有点孤单
浅浅的忧郁
我不知道明天会不会很美丽
虽然今天天很蓝
而云很白
风很凉
今天日记空白没有关系
不必每件事情都在意
不想工作
不想困扰自己
不必刻意想你
该是我的总会来
就算挑战
我不走开
一点点你的微笑
已经让我觉得温暖
我还不懂坚持
正好让我
学会去爱
我曾经看见困难
变得胆小
不够勇敢
但还是要相信
相信感觉
相信简单

just sharing some photos taken at the Wild honey, the place tht v had drinks :>

GOod Morning.

is 9am, i seldom wake up so early. waking up by myself..without the irritating alarm sound makes me feel good! i guess the weather just match everything nicely. is drizzling out there and the sky is really dark..gloomy. I LIKE IT. the best thing to do nw is have a sip of hot nice tea and read newspaper..or watch the news..keke.

looking at the mirrors and realise my dark eye circle is getting darker day by day.eye bags so obvious too.skin condition..bad bad.hmm, is tht due to my sleeping late habit? i have been telling myself to sleep before 12am, bt sometimes when i went to bed earlier, i can toss n turn there for an hour before i really fall asleep. what's wrong?

i met with my japanese teacher last night for a drink. guess what, my japanese became so lousy n almost forgot what i've learnt in the past. cracking my brains just try to split out some simple sentences..it's Tough. my teacher asked me to sit for another paper this year end, as to motivate me! bt i doubt i have the time for it. i knew if i were to attend class again, i would definately study and work real hard. bt i m not going to do that because i know my goal nw. not to waste too much $ for fees( i used to learn a lotsa stuffs last time and kept paying fees), i just want to set a target. WORK HARD and SAVE HARD. and save for a bigger amount of school fees again.i am so so wanna enter school lifes again.hmm then for my japanese..i learnt it because it's just my interest, is nt always too late for me to pick up this language again in the future, i have tht passion..bt maybe stopping for quite some time it will affect my progress, but IS OKAY.

so we went to mandarin gallery to meet up, suppose to go my favourite place --arteastiq,bt we walked past a nice shop too. usually nt because of the food that attracted us, it was those nice furnishing caught our eyes! and we gave it a try. we had to order the food at the counter as they didn't provide menus. and there were no pictures to see, this's the worst part. standing there, looking at the menus ( written on blackboard at the counter), took us some time to choose ..lucky there was no one queuing behind us..

笑笑没烦恼！

笑一笑，就这么简单！可是真的每个人都能做得到吗？
能，不信? 试着对镜子笑笑吧！只不过你的笑是哪一种笑呢？发自内心，真诚的吗？
虚伪的，狡猾的，敷衍应酬式的，讥讽嘲笑式的；还是可爱的，甜美的，单纯亮丽式的，开心简单式的？笑也是一种学问。懂得笑看人生何尝不是一件好事。话说容易，真正能做到的并没有几个。做人心胸宽大，放得开，不太斤斤计较，就能会心一笑。



有时教课时，会因为学生没练琴而被气坏，真不明白浪费父母的钱来学钢琴，却不肯花时间练习，还来上课有什么意思？我也曾经是这样子，但我有自知之明，所以选择不学了！可现在的孩子身在福中不知福，觉得是应得的，有时还真替哪些父母心疼哪昂贵的学费！ 要劝的也劝了，要谈的也谈了，连不该骂的也骂了，还是老样子！怎么办？你跟他讲道理，他给你一堆歪理。除了对着他们笑，我也没法了。但我不能因此而放弃，仍在不停的想点子来激发他们才行！有时真的很累，但想到自己的学生有所成就，是多么开心！唉，谁叫我是“老师”么！几时才能卸下老师这职位，重新再当学生呢？

我不想长大！并不是幼稚才这么说，也许是想得太成熟了吧，太遥远了！当岁月不知不觉与你擦肩而过，细纹开始浮现，才来感叹这才是路程的起点。

--------------------------
如果我是小孩
我能对你撒娇
能每晚对你说晚安
半夜睡不着能吵醒你，一起伴我如睡
有你拖着我的小手走街
和你有没完没了的争吵后再和好如初
上学 补习 做功课 熬夜读书
很怀念这些日子
--------------------------

时间过了都不能回头，我又想家了。


生活也许就像一面镜子。你对它笑，它就对你笑；你对它哭，它就对你哭。当很多时候改变不了环境时，改变自己。改变不了事实，可以改变态度。改变不了过去，但可以改变现在。你不能控制他人，但能掌握自己。你不能预测明天，但能把握今天。你不能样样顺利，但能样样尽心。你不能延长生命的长度，但你能决定它的宽度。你不能左右天气，但能改变心情。你不能改变容貌，但却能展现笑容! 笑笑吧！

谈寂寞

你寂寞吗？难道寂寞就一定很可悲了吗？
你把寂寞看成什么颜色？灰的，白的，黑的还是蓝的？
蓝色的寂寞其实可以很宁静。就犹如寂寞深处的情景。
因为寂寞，所以让我有时间思考，面对自己。
寂寞也是种对话，与自己的对话。
人在能够真正思考时，是最美的。
而你也一样，因寂寞而美丽。
当一个人忙得没有机会面对自己，显得更孤单，寂寞。

untitled

y i have this feeling again? feeling no good? feeling incomplete? feeling insecure?i'm still a lost person again. when everyone ask me "how r u doing? how's lifes? " well, it couldnt be any better is always my answer. bt what makes life so complicated and yet it can be real simple.
sometimes you have to keep asking what you want in life, what is your goal , how far u want to go?is just too tiring to think bout the FUTURE when i cant juggle my PRESENT. life isnt hard compared to those really in poverty ..etc.

reflecting my life again, and i can harldy see anything.

feeling no good.

what is the feeling when you try to look for someone bt they just keep turning u down. either saying "i'm nt free nw, i'll call u later, i'm having...bla bla..n so on."i hate this feeling very much. alright, i guess maybe when i need somebody, there's always NOBODY.the worst part is u'll keep waiting for the someone to call back, and yet they can just forget bout this.so, who to blame? blaming them for being busy? blaming myself for being stupid n wait? blaming me for calling at the wrong time?

well i just don't feel good at all right now, at this very moment. there's no one for me to reach.
thieves broke into my house on saturday night. as i will only back in hometown end of this month, so i still cant calculate my total damage. from my parents, seems nothing left behind. the painful part is i lost all my money collection. hmm, i have a weird habit of collecting money notes which end on my birth date. which is 728. I have collected quite a lot for few yeas including other foreign countries currency as well. and to my disappoinment, the thieves grabbed everything. i'm sad not because of the amount they stole, is just some uncountable years and effort on searhcing those notes. i tresure them a lot! i didnt cry ( i used to do that always when i'm sad), i just cant describe my feeling nw.feeling so lost.